I often wonder just what kind of a world it would be if only Gimbals had become the dominant department store chain. The air would be fresh and pure! Hovercars would run on sunshine and smiles. Peppermint sticks would grow on trees, every family would own their own diamond mine, humans could coexist with beavers, and Seven Up Gold would still be on the market. Everyone would live in peace and harmony; Jews, Gentiles, Muslims, Capitalists, ...Pinkos, you name it! Instead we have Macy's and the neighbors' dogs won't shut up at 1 in the morning.
Feb 3, 2005
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2 comments:
"humans could coexist with beavers"
This reminds me of a "poem" in a book by Joe Wenderoth called Letters to Wendy's. The premise is this guy frequenting Wendy's and writing on the suggestion cards. The whole book. In one of the entries he decides--my memory may embellish--that one of the employees is a beaver. It's one of my top five in the book. For some reason I found it stunningly funny.
Seven Up Gold was the best goddamn cola. It was yanked quickly for some reason (maybe it had crack in it). They probably realized it ruined their whole "never had it, never will" slogan about caffeine. bastards.
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