That Tail's Gotta Be Really, Really Long

Word on the street is niche markets are reshaping the new economy. Actually it isn't the street so much as the corporate boardroom, where crusty old White guys in suits steer the course of my life and yours toward the most profitable destination (for them). Stuff one hears on the street sounds more like: "Ohmigawd, that skirt is SO nawt hawt", "Didjew hear? Mel Gibson's changing his name to Gibblestein", & "I'll suck yo' dick fo' five dollas" (truth be told only one of these has been said to me).

Anyway, to get the jump on the new direction in which we're headed, here's a list of the "next" "big" "sellers" for the niche folk:
<sub>1. footbath flavored potato snacks
2. gift certificate to the "Saggy Grannies In Soiled Adult Diapers" revue
3. Pigfucker TV
4. drugs, drugs, drugs
5. Hot Pockets' Pre-chewed Dinners
6. Danielle Steele books. No WAY a mass audience would be into THAT crap
7. Fruit for Dessert, Inc. franchise rights
8. Instructional video for men: "How to sit with your legs together on crowded public transportation"
9. We Love Bird Flu Club membership
10. subscription to Spice Up Your Anus magazine, the bi-weekly publication dedicated to people who like putting spice & other condiments in their rectums.</sub>