Want to show your age, grampa? Turn a key to fire up your wagon! With many automobile manufacturers now touting pushbutton ignition systems in their vehicles, can zero-emission hovercars be far behind? What other technological marvels are peeking at us from around the corner? Bet on the following five:
1. Pushbutton flies for your trousers - Guys all hate fumbling with the zipper when it's time to make yellow. And the designer of those "button-flies" was hauled off in a straightjacket a long time ago. But with the pushbutton fly, just depress the red switch on the end of the slider and watch the automated system unzip itself! Go to the bathroom in style!
2. Hammer with USB-powered GPS system - Ever been in that scenario where you really need to hammer something but you're lost on the backroads of megalopolisville? Ditto. That was the thinking that inspired this brainchild. It's a hammer but with a built-in state-of-the-art GPS unit in the head. (USB cable not included)
3. Auto-hinge eyeglass frames - Automate everything!™ These beautiful frames are equipped with the latest nano technology. Pressure-sensitive gyros tell the unit when they are being worn & when they are being removed. Two seconds upon removal, the auto-hinge© activates and folds up the earpieces! No muss, no fuss!
4. iPod flavored Lucky Charms - Being a child these days is no easy task. Peer pressure. Fast-paced technology. It's enough to drive you Cuckoo for Cocoapuf... (oops). Make sure your kids start the day off right with this hip new line of cereal. It's like they're eating technology!™ Fortified with 14 essential vitamins & nutrients, iPod flavored Lucky Charms come in black, white, shuffle, nano, and video flavors* complete with iPod shaped marshmallows. (*warning: utensils may not be fully compatible with all varieties. Check with manufacturer)
5. Ignition System for PCs - Overclockers & techgeeks rejoice! If you really want to rev up your gaming rig, ditch the pushbutton on/off switch and install this new ignition system on your PC. Be the bad-ass at the next LAN party and leave your foes in the dust. Just insert the key, give it a crank, wait for Windows to boot up, and get ready to burn up the information superhighway.
Feb 6, 2007
Our Golden Era
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
I'd like automatic condoms. Just drop them in the general direction of your privates and a GPS unit guides them to their proper location..
Or maybe Manhunt 2 for the Wii
I want a shrinkray. or more specifically, shrinkable cars that can attach to your keychain. Then I won't have to worry about finding a parking spot and those persistent meter maids. Is that asking too much?
I would be happy with any of those 3 as long as that condom feature only worked with new ones and the shrunken car's weigh shrank accordingly. Otherwise there's plenty of risk there to the nether-regions.
I really want the IPOD flavored lucky charms. But you know what would be really cool? eyeglasses with propellers on the lenses
Post a Comment