Jun 5, 2008

them?

Once upon a time I used to venture out in the daylight hours and be appalled by the people I'd see. The world overrun by pitiable wretches: old folks scavenging for senior coffee & triple coupon deals, lone parents muttering gibberish whilst overseeing their brood of kids in a McDonalds booth, & businesspeople sitting by themselves, staring & slack-jawed, most likely contemplating suicide.

So let me just say it was much to my unpleasant surprise this past tuesday, when I drove out aimlessly to grab a bite to eat before landing in a (surprise!) McDonalds, that I completely felt like one of them for the first time that I can truly recall. Defeated, bitter, hopeless, & lamentable. I could have just as easily been biting the heads off those kids around me as chewing on my french fries because I really couldn't have given less of a shit. Whenever I overheard smatterings of lame office-lunchy conversations my first thought was, "well, I guess that's reasonable stuff".

Suffice to say, this has been quite a shitty year for reasons I can't quite put a finger on yet. Scary, but I hope it's just a phase of weakness that I will quickly pass through. I've got quite a few years left before I can get that senior discount coffee...

4 comments:

Violet said...

It's tough to feel you're just like everyone else. But you aren't. Most people don't blog about breakfast cereals, for one thing.

nigel paddell said...

I'm going with Phase.
Four years ago I couldn't handle being in public (and public is like everywhere) because I had just too much anger to be in front of people or have people in front of me.
Going native isn't all bad as long as you remember that the world is actually bigger than they know.

Dmonster said...

Jiayo-

Something to cheer you up when you're feeling shitty:

http://www.randomkittengenerator.com/

PBS said...

That's why I'm hoping to net a night job...